Monday, September 14, 2009

Top 9 reasons I can not report to work today

People always seem to want to lay out of work, especially on a Monday. Well, this week, VUI offers the Top 9 reasons I cannot make it to work today.

9) I did not realize bourbon was stronger than beer.

8) My head, my head, I am so wasted. Did I say that? No, I got a virus.

7) I heard some guy at the office had a cough. It could be swine flu. I better stay home and avoid it.

6) She is 22, hot and wants me to stay a little longer.

5) Why are you asking me why I can’t come in today? Do you have some racial issues?

4) My country needs me to spend the day protesting outside of Joe Wilson’s office.

3) I just cannot face any Georgia fans today.

2) I told the guys here at the jail I needed to go to work, but they won’t let me leave.

1)My lady friend in Argentina called me and said I needed to come down and cry with her.


  1. #10 - I'm hiking the Appalachian Trail.