9) As you enter the football stadium, you notice a sign that reads, “NO TOBBACCO USE WITHOUT A SPIT CUP ALLOWED.”
8) The Homecoming Queen rides around in a car with a big dent in the side in it. The dent is blamed on “Will and his drinking last weekend.”
7) There are more “mullets” in the stands than wins by your football team.
6) There is a childcare program for the cheerleaders.
5) The concession stand has a guy selling soft drinks who yells out “mixers and chasers.”
4) Your kid‘s jersey has “Pickens” on it.
3) It is fourth down and one, and one of your team’s coaches blurts out over the radio from the coaches’ box, “you guys see that MILF sitting at the 30 yard line.”
2) County deputies have to sort out the mess after more than a dozen fans claim that they shot the buck that wandered into the parking lot.
1) The Homecoming Queen is sponsored by “her baby’s daddy.”