Monday, October 11, 2010

Top signs your child attends a redneck high school

9) As you enter the football stadium, you notice a sign that reads, “NO TOBBACCO USE WITHOUT A SPIT CUP ALLOWED.”

8) The Homecoming Queen rides around in a car with a big dent in the side in it. The dent is blamed on “Will and his drinking last weekend.”

7) There are more “mullets” in the stands than wins by your football team.

6) There is a childcare program for the cheerleaders.

5) The concession stand has a guy selling soft drinks who yells out “mixers and chasers.”

4) Your kid‘s jersey has “Pickens” on it.

3) It is fourth down and one, and one of your team’s coaches blurts out over the radio from the coaches’ box, “you guys see that MILF sitting at the 30 yard line.”

2) County deputies have to sort out the mess after more than a dozen fans claim that they shot the buck that wandered into the parking lot.

1) The Homecoming Queen is sponsored by “her baby’s daddy.”

6 comments:

  1. Mr. McCarty,

    I find it funny that a man from Honea Path would choose to make fun of Pickens. While I would have to agree with you that Pickens has its fair share of rednecks, BHP was no bastion of culture and fashion. I have spent many a night at Lou and Perry's and have not been mentally stimulated by the locals, physically threatened by the locals many times, but never have I thought there is a well rounded (mentally) person. You are of course the exception that proves the rule. I personally think that you are just jealous because we have a better mascot than B-HP, maybe it is the state titles, maybe it is the mountains. But just remember this, our redneck would kick your rednecks' butt!

    Love,

    Rev. Dr. Kyle E. Sims
    Pickens High Class of 89

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  2. Pastor Kyle,

    Pickens, with their document cheap shots trying to hurt our Bears, got beat 69-7. Thank you, McCarty for standing up for our Bears!

    Pastor, maybe you need to go to Pickens and teach those boys something about class and sportsmanship.

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  3. Amen, Bear Mom. What happened to a kid about three years ago by a cheap shot by a Pickens player kept that kid for playing Division I football.

    Pastor, I would not brag on being from Pickens. They cheat AND lose.

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  4. A Holy Ghost BearOctober 15, 2010

    69-7, Praise the Lord

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  5. You were making fun of the car at Dixie.

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  6. I am sorry to hear of such behavior that is unacceptable even among rednecks. In truth I love Honea Path I spent much time and money there while attending Erskine. Mr. McCarty is a dear friend and I just thought it funny he would pick on my High school.

    Rev. Dr. Kyle E. Sims
    Erskine Class of 93

    ReplyDelete