Thursday, December 30, 2010

Top 9 things not to say on New Year's Eve

9) Nikki, where the Hell did all these people with towels on their heads come from?

8) Hey, ya’ll watch this. Junior is gonna launch my sparkler bomb right from my own hand.

7) Look Uncle Earl, Dick Clark talks like you do.

6) Will you guys put me on You Tube if I launch a bottle rocket from between my butt cheeks?

5) Look at this picture of me, baby.  I got my Alvin Greene going on this New Years Eve.

4) Officer, would you like a swig? It is the good stuff.

3) Come on baby, nobody gets pregnant on New Year’s Eve. It’s a law.

2) Ya'll mind if I pee in the corner here.  Somebody's in the bathroom and its cold outside.

1) Officer, I cannot stand on one foot sober, much less after all I had to drink.


  1. You anti Indian racism is noted. Good luck at your next hotel stay, buddy.

  2. Nikki Haley is charge, you redneck

  3. By towel head, do you mean the same towel Jesus and his mom wore?

  4. Can't wait until we hear the talk "according to Voting Under The Influence, blogger Earl Capps ... "

    Thanks a lot. I'll be sure to write your cell phone on some bathroom walls. Maybe get Working Mom drunk and send her to your place.

  5. some people really need sense of humor. You Haley people have your heads stuck up your asses and you are a real pain in the ass for those of us who laugh our asses off at your towel headed asses loving some damn cow.